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Rock Beats Scissors, Revolver Beats Shithead


Rock Beats Scissors, Revolver Beats Shithead
A brief introduction to armed home


for a Satanic Witch.

by Magister Kevin I. Slaughter

a feature for The Black Flame

October, L A.S. 

A dear friend recently moved into a new place that she felt is not as safe and secure as the one she’d left, there were far too many shitheads (street criminals) around to be comfortable. She asked me for a recommendation for a home defense gun. She doesn’t own a firearm and hasn’t shot guns in a while. She lives in a “freedom friendly” state, so there is no difference between buying a handgun or a long gun (shotgun or rifle). Various firearm restrictions in different states throw in all kinds of bureaucratic hoops to jump through and fees to pay and delays of days or weeks or months.

Dear _____,

I will bypass any serious discussion of the law and how it relates to shooting a shithead. I’ll leave it to you and google for now to find out if you have a “castle doctrine” or “stand your ground” law where you live. I’ll limit my guidance to just this: “make sure they’re inside the house.” The choice to own and use a firearm is a serious one, and you should follow the laws.

The “right gun” for any individual is subjective, because people are not equal, and the tasks they’re used for varies so greatly. That’s why when you walk into a gun store there are so many choices. Firearms are tools to be used for specific jobs, and just as you wouldn’t buy a pot metal screwdriver to build a house, you wouldn’t buy a jackhammer to repair a watch. Some tools are more versatile than others, but you buy the tool with consideration for the primary use.

For a woman looking to purchase something for home defense, who is unable to test fire and practice with a bunch of different guns to find “just the right one”, I offer two recommendations to narrow things down. There are many options that could be considered that are beyond the scope of this letter, but my intent here is to give you the simplest and most practical advice I can, since I’m unable to help you in person.

The first suggestion is a revolver in .357 magnum with a 3-6” barrel. It will allow you to practice with the less powerful .38 special shells to get used to it, but have the more powerful .357 ammo for home defense if you’re confident shooting it. Use hollow point bullets for home defense. Not only are they more effective, but it’s safer in that it’s designed to stop inside the shithead, rather than passing through into whatever or whomever is behind him. A .38 special only revolver tends to be less expensive, and still could be effective.

Most revolvers will be 5 or 6 shots, but there are 7 and even 8 shot revolvers as well. Most home defense shootings only involve 2-3 shots from the defender, but having more is good, because you might not be involved in the “most common type” of home invasion.

A new or used Smith & Wesson is a great choice. The Ruger GP100 is a solid revolver as well and older Colts are just fine. There are cheaper brands, but they should be avoided when buying your first and possibly only firearm. They won’t be as reliable, as a rule, and reliability is more important than most other decisions (like what color it is).

My second recommendation is a 20 gauge pump shotgun. Get a defensive specific gun in 18" or 20" barrel. The magazine tube should hold 6 to 8 rounds. 20ga has less recoil (or “kick”) than a 12ga but is still fine for shooting shitheads. Remington 870 20ga defense with a 7 round tube would be a solid, reliable and fairly inexpensive choice. Sporting and hunting shotguns generally have much longer barrels, and therefore not good for moving around inside.

Semi-auto pistols are fine if you’re comfortable with them and practice, as they can be more complex. With a revolver, if it’s loaded, all you do is pick it up, point it at the shithead and pull the trigger until he’s stopped moving, no longer a threat, or you’re out of rounds.

Stay away from off brands. A used Smith & Wesson revolver in decent shape is probably better/more reliable than many brand new guns. This is a tool you might have to use to save your life or the life of a loved one. I’ve bought cheap tools, they tend to break when I need them most, because that’s when I’m putting the most stress on them.

Gun stores will probably be willing to haggle, especially when you’ve got cash (the green stuff, not a debit card or a check), and especially with any smart gal (see: “The Satanic Witch”). As a bonus, good guns will hold value better than most other things. If you spend $500 on a used gun at a store you should be able to sell it later for $250-300 to a shop later, and maybe get $400-$500 (or more) person to person (check local laws on this).

One of the most common temptations for both men and women, when gun shopping for a woman, is to buy a “small” gun because it looks “cute” (“not as threatening”, etc.). Smaller guns are generally less controllable to shoot, and therefore people tend to be far less accurate with multiple shots. If you’re keeping it for home defense, as opposed to concealed carry, then get something comfortable to hold with a little weight. Physics tells us a heavier gun will “kick” less than a lighter gun shooting the same round, and longer barrel will be more accurate than a shorter barrel.

Also a very common idea is that the sound of pumping a shotgun should be sufficient to “scare intruders away”. I personally believe this is a bad idea because it lets shitheads know where you are, and possibly before you’re fully prepared to defend yourself. Getting shot is generally more effective motivation for shitheads to run away, if they’re still able to move.

Go out and practice at least occasionally. Paper targets aren’t the same as moving people, but it’s better than nothing at all.  For some perspective: most police will train two or three times a year. An FBI study showed criminals who were involved in violent assaults with Police trained about 23 times a year. About 40% had already been involved in at least one gunfight, and 25% had been involved in more than 5 gunfights.

A gun writer named Jeff Cooper came up with a simple list of four “rules” for safe firearm handling, and they should be memorized and never strayed from:
1. All guns are always loaded.

2. Never let the muzzle cover anything you are not willing to destroy.

3. Keep your finger off the trigger until your sights are on the target.

4. Be sure of your target and what is beyond it.

So many accidental deaths and injuries could be avoided if everyone practiced just the 1st rule constantly. Every time you pick up a gun, or someone else does, assume it is loaded until YOU have proven it to be safe.

And, finally, the advice I’ve told my wife, that I repeat at least once every other year:

If someone breaks into our house, try to secure yourself in a bedroom with a gun and a phone. Call 911 and give them the address and that there is an armed man in the house trying to attack you. If they’ve acknowledged, then put the phone down but don’t hang up. You now only need to be focused on your personal defense for the 5 to 30 or more minutes that it will take the police to arrive. Don’t seek out the shithead. Let them take whatever they want, but blow them the fuck away if they come at you. Aim for center mass, as close to the center between the neck and crotch. Once it is over you may be temporarily deafened, in shock, hurt or otherwise upset. Remember one phrase: “He was going to kill me.” There is nothing in the house as precious and irreplaceable as you.