Church of Satan Sigil of Baphomet

The Feigned Martyrdom of Kim Davis


The death throes of righteous Christianity—that arrogant belief system used to forcing others to bend to its irrational dogmas—offer its more masochistic adherents the opportunity for martyrdom through punishment they so richly deserve, but not for the reasons they claim.

According to the New York Times, Ms. Davis’ lawyer, Roger Gannam, believes she has been incarcerated for her “belief of conscience that marriage is the union of one man and one woman”. This is incorrect, she’s in jail because she refuses to do her job and is being held in contempt of court for acting as if she’s above the rule of law. Unfortunately the media is giving this miserable failure the gift of fame and notoriety well beyond her sub-mediocre capabilities. While the spotlight happens to shine on this one dimwit, who wants to place the dictates of her mythical God above the law of the land, the success of a certain parody Twitter account reveals a level of sympathy for those who have to put up with such banal solipsism on a daily basis.

—Reverend Raul Antony